Our impressions of Holland are much the same as they were last time - impractical plumbing, small spaces, friendly people, wonderful food - so we needn't go into all that again. Possibly the most memorable part of the whole trip for me was coming down with a horrific cold the day after we arrived and fighting with said cold the whole blighted trip, thus rendering all my memories overshadowed by a fog of sneezing and sniffling which left me wondering why on earth people ever took snuff so as to do this to themselves on purpose.
We're getting back on track now. Jane and Ella are still waking up rather early in the mornings, which is probably good for us all. Oh, but it's good to be back!
Thursday, March 27, 2008
Wednesday, March 05, 2008
JAMBOG, Phase II
(See here for rules.) (See here for Phase I.)
Scenario #3: You're imprisoned in an old castle dungeon. Guards stand outside your cell. A moat surrounds the castle. How do you escape?
Katy shivered in the cold darkness of the old castle dungeon. Dressed only in her pyjamas, she rued the day that she had come begging to the gates of Castle Bruster. 'Only a little scoop of ice cream,' she had implored, but the merciless Baron had thrown her into the dungeon rather than part with one scrap of his lavish medieval feast.
Presently Katy took heart. Surely she might contrive a way of escape. She scanned her cell for inspiration, and noticed, to her surprise, a cup of coke sitting on the bars in the window. An idea struck her with blinding force, but she quickly recovered, and called for the guard:
'Oh! Guard!' Katy called out, trying to think of a plausible excuse. The guard unlocked the cell door and came in to see what was the matter, and Katy quickly threw the cup of very flat coke into his eyes. He staggered and tripped, and in a trice Katy seized the keys, swung the great door to, and locked it behind the guard.
Quickly she ran down the flagstone hallway, looking for a way out. Just as she reached a larger passage, she heard a clamour of loud shouts and footsteps. Katy looked about her for a hiding place, but there was none. At the last minute, she seized the large, silver globe of a light from the hall lampstand. When the patrol of guards came around the corner, they saw what appeared to be a gypsy sitting on the floor, waving her hands mysteriously over a magic ball.
'Come! Look ye into my crystal ball and see what your futures shall hold!' Katy intoned.
'That ain't crystal - that be silver,' protested one of the guards, licking his ice-cream cone, for they had just come from the medieval feast.
'Well, come look into its silver depths, and see how crystal clear your future shall become!' Katy replied. Interested, the guards all peered downward. Katy set the ball spinning at the guards, who dropped their ice cream cones, slipped, and went down like ninepins. Katy darted around them and rushed up a stone passage.
She found herself in the castle kitchen, where the roaring fire sent out a cheerful glow. There were cod sizzling on a pan over the fire, sending out deliciously tempting smells. But Katy had other fish to fry. She spotted a huge colander of alfalfa sprouts which the cook had left out, and an idea flashed into her head. Gathering up bundles in her arms, she ran up to the highest turret and arranged the sprouts into a rough semblance of a bird's nest, which she curled up in the middle of.
Within a very few minutes, the giant rocs circling the castle caught sight of her and came swooping down. One of them clutched her in its talons, whisked her across the moat, and set her down gently in safety. And thereupon was she at liberty to continue her quest for free ice cream.
Scenario #3: You're imprisoned in an old castle dungeon. Guards stand outside your cell. A moat surrounds the castle. How do you escape?
Katy shivered in the cold darkness of the old castle dungeon. Dressed only in her pyjamas, she rued the day that she had come begging to the gates of Castle Bruster. 'Only a little scoop of ice cream,' she had implored, but the merciless Baron had thrown her into the dungeon rather than part with one scrap of his lavish medieval feast.
Presently Katy took heart. Surely she might contrive a way of escape. She scanned her cell for inspiration, and noticed, to her surprise, a cup of coke sitting on the bars in the window. An idea struck her with blinding force, but she quickly recovered, and called for the guard:
'Oh! Guard!' Katy called out, trying to think of a plausible excuse. The guard unlocked the cell door and came in to see what was the matter, and Katy quickly threw the cup of very flat coke into his eyes. He staggered and tripped, and in a trice Katy seized the keys, swung the great door to, and locked it behind the guard.
Quickly she ran down the flagstone hallway, looking for a way out. Just as she reached a larger passage, she heard a clamour of loud shouts and footsteps. Katy looked about her for a hiding place, but there was none. At the last minute, she seized the large, silver globe of a light from the hall lampstand. When the patrol of guards came around the corner, they saw what appeared to be a gypsy sitting on the floor, waving her hands mysteriously over a magic ball.
'Come! Look ye into my crystal ball and see what your futures shall hold!' Katy intoned.
'That ain't crystal - that be silver,' protested one of the guards, licking his ice-cream cone, for they had just come from the medieval feast.
'Well, come look into its silver depths, and see how crystal clear your future shall become!' Katy replied. Interested, the guards all peered downward. Katy set the ball spinning at the guards, who dropped their ice cream cones, slipped, and went down like ninepins. Katy darted around them and rushed up a stone passage.
She found herself in the castle kitchen, where the roaring fire sent out a cheerful glow. There were cod sizzling on a pan over the fire, sending out deliciously tempting smells. But Katy had other fish to fry. She spotted a huge colander of alfalfa sprouts which the cook had left out, and an idea flashed into her head. Gathering up bundles in her arms, she ran up to the highest turret and arranged the sprouts into a rough semblance of a bird's nest, which she curled up in the middle of.
Within a very few minutes, the giant rocs circling the castle caught sight of her and came swooping down. One of them clutched her in its talons, whisked her across the moat, and set her down gently in safety. And thereupon was she at liberty to continue her quest for free ice cream.
Tuesday, March 04, 2008
Fashion Tirade
Of course there's no such thing as objective fashion, because what we inherently find attractive is inevitably going to be coloured by the pervading fads and trends that have shaped our cultural awareness. But it is slightly frustrating to me to be so completely unable to find a decisive answer on what specific looks actually look the nicest, without regard to what sleight-of-hand they're trying to accomplish.
The driving force behind most fashion 'looks' seems to be mainly concerned with creating the illusion of tallness and thinness. Vertical lines (not stripes! Because that would be too obvious!) are supposed to lengthen and slim the figure. Skirts that stop just above the knee are supposed to make the legs look longer, as opposed to the drab, mid-calf length, which makes the legs look dumpy. Boot-cut jeans balance the legs, making the thighs look narrower in context. Skinny jeans give a slimming line and make the legs look longer.
I have yet to read a useful piece of advice on which look actually looks the nicest for its own sake. Since I am pretty happy with my shape, I really don't feel compelled to resort to optical illusions in my wardrobe; I'd much rather not waste time agonising over whether a particular style causes me to look - even if ever so slightly - like something I am not.
This annoyance of mine carries over to the perpetual articles in magazines and what-have-you, where we're regaled with Tips For Disguising Figure Flaws and Ten Easy Ways To Look Up To Five Pounds Slimmer. My thought is, rather than waste all that time and energy and effort studying these principles, buying new clothes, tanning, etc., why not just go ahead and lose the five pounds? I mean, if it's a legitimate figure flaw that needs to be fixed, then fix it. Otherwise, stop worrying about it.
The driving force behind most fashion 'looks' seems to be mainly concerned with creating the illusion of tallness and thinness. Vertical lines (not stripes! Because that would be too obvious!) are supposed to lengthen and slim the figure. Skirts that stop just above the knee are supposed to make the legs look longer, as opposed to the drab, mid-calf length, which makes the legs look dumpy. Boot-cut jeans balance the legs, making the thighs look narrower in context. Skinny jeans give a slimming line and make the legs look longer.
I have yet to read a useful piece of advice on which look actually looks the nicest for its own sake. Since I am pretty happy with my shape, I really don't feel compelled to resort to optical illusions in my wardrobe; I'd much rather not waste time agonising over whether a particular style causes me to look - even if ever so slightly - like something I am not.
This annoyance of mine carries over to the perpetual articles in magazines and what-have-you, where we're regaled with Tips For Disguising Figure Flaws and Ten Easy Ways To Look Up To Five Pounds Slimmer. My thought is, rather than waste all that time and energy and effort studying these principles, buying new clothes, tanning, etc., why not just go ahead and lose the five pounds? I mean, if it's a legitimate figure flaw that needs to be fixed, then fix it. Otherwise, stop worrying about it.
Redbox rocks!
A few weeks ago I gave Redbox a try for the first time. I'd read about it online and heard great things about it, but when I finally got around to trying it out, I was less than impressed. The 'free' code I'd been proffered didn't work, and the customer service rep with whom I spoke seemed ambivalent about solving the problem for me and even suggested that the code malfunction might be a common problem. I wrote a very thorough email to customer support, listing my perturbations and suspecting them of pulling a bait-and-switch by deliberately offering free goods/services which were merely designed to lure new customers in.
Customer service responded in fine style. I received a very courteous and apologetic response, explaining that the glitch with the code was a temporary issue, that Redbox really is in the habit of offering absolutely free rentals, and giving me two free codes on the spot as a goodwill gesture. Their reputation properly restored, I gave them another chance, and now commence to sing their praises. Both codes worked like a charm, and I became hooked.
Redbox, in case you haven't heard of it, is like a vending machine of new release DVDs located in various popular locations such as Wal-marts and McDonalds. Check their website to find one near you. The cost is usually $1 a day, but there are so many free codes emerging that you can pretty much get one for free any time you want.
It works for Redbox, because if you are late returning your DVD, you get charged $1. Still, that's not much for a movie rental (and hey, last I checked, Blockbuster was charging $4.29 for new releases!) So far we have always been prompt about returning our movies on time, and the location is very convenient. We are definitely fans.
Customer service responded in fine style. I received a very courteous and apologetic response, explaining that the glitch with the code was a temporary issue, that Redbox really is in the habit of offering absolutely free rentals, and giving me two free codes on the spot as a goodwill gesture. Their reputation properly restored, I gave them another chance, and now commence to sing their praises. Both codes worked like a charm, and I became hooked.
Redbox, in case you haven't heard of it, is like a vending machine of new release DVDs located in various popular locations such as Wal-marts and McDonalds. Check their website to find one near you. The cost is usually $1 a day, but there are so many free codes emerging that you can pretty much get one for free any time you want.
It works for Redbox, because if you are late returning your DVD, you get charged $1. Still, that's not much for a movie rental (and hey, last I checked, Blockbuster was charging $4.29 for new releases!) So far we have always been prompt about returning our movies on time, and the location is very convenient. We are definitely fans.
Reflections
Ten years ago this year I left Oregon.
My oldest younger brother, now twenty, was ten when we left. That means that he's spent half his life in Oregon and half in Virginia. The others, still younger, have spent most of their lives in Virginia. For some of them, Oregon - my childhood home and all my growing-up memories - is but a distant memory.
The children I used to babysit are now old enough to babysit my children.
And here's the real kicker: as of next month, I will have lived as long in Georgia as I ever lived in Virginia!!
My oldest younger brother, now twenty, was ten when we left. That means that he's spent half his life in Oregon and half in Virginia. The others, still younger, have spent most of their lives in Virginia. For some of them, Oregon - my childhood home and all my growing-up memories - is but a distant memory.
The children I used to babysit are now old enough to babysit my children.
And here's the real kicker: as of next month, I will have lived as long in Georgia as I ever lived in Virginia!!
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