Largess

I've discovered a new line of graft: simple, highly effective, seemingly endless potential for returns. I've decided to share my success story only upon the reflection that the majority of my readership are (is? are? Arrgh!) not local and thus in no danger of cutting in on my market. The scheme is this: Get pregnant, and wait for the returns to come rolling in.

Suddenly people are flooding me with attention, food, services, and, most importantly, clothes. At least once a week someone offers to stand me lunch, and hardly a day goes by that someone doesn't offer to bring me something from the snack machine. Or they're sharing their bag of chips. Or making sure I have enough to drink, or eat, and of the right nutritional composition. Most amazingly, though, is the clothes situation. Somewhat put off by the steep prices - albeit cute styles - of maternity clothes that day we went shopping a few weeks ago, I fell into a brown study on the topic of my maternity wardrobe, contemplating with almost wistful regret (O me of little faith!) the thought that, if we were living in Virginia, no doubt the stones themselves would rise up and flood me with maternity clothes - but alas, starting off in a new community, with friends of the right size mostly in a stage of life not to be getting rid of maternity clothes...well, it was too bad, but there you had it. And yet, this past month has positively been a meteorogical study in the phenomenon of the opening of the windows of Heaven, as several ladies from work have brought in assorted collections of pants, sweaters, and dresses that more or less work, and should work for at least the next three months. It's like Christmas every day!